Hindi pa din Ikaw

A friend was texting me. May problema din to sa puso (not literally though). She was telling me that her ex boyfriend has found a new girl. That only took him 1 month after the break up. Bad trip di ba? Di bale sana kung kagwapuhan sya, e hindi, hindi, hindi! Peace!
Tapos, ang babaeng ito e kilala ng friend ko. Pambihira. Pede namang iba diba? At least, less painful sya.
And that's what i thought.
I told her na sana hindi nalang yung babaeng kakilala nya ang kapalagayang loob ni ex. Sana e kumuha man lang sa malayo. Sana ibang tao nalang.
I thought that my friend will tell me, you know tama ka. Mas madaling tanggapin kung iba na lang. Infact, kung sa akin nangyari yun, i will definitely feel a little ok na hindi ko kilala yung 3rd party. SANA IBANG TAO NA LANG, WAG LANG SYA.
Pero sabi ng friend ko, hindi mas unti ang pain na madarama kung kilala mo man o hindi ang karibal mo. Pareho lang ng intensity. Masakit pa din. Bakit? Simple lang.
Kasi yung IBANG TAO na mahal nya, e hindi pa din ikaw.

Jammed Frequency

All this time, i thought that nothing is missing...that my world is already complete. The you came and made me realize na meron pa palang pedeng idagdag dito sa maliit kong mundo.
You made me believe that life is more colorful with you around. And I totally agree. Utu-uto ako e. I even made you the center of my universe, the focal point of my life.
In my dreams, you are mine.
Kaya lang when reality sets in, alam ko namang you do not feel the same way. Na isa lang ako sa mga super friends mo. That all these good things you are showering me are also being given to all of your friends. Kumbaga, i am just one of them.
Hindi katulad mo sa buhay ko, isa ka lang. Sobrang nag iisa.
But then again, nakakapagod ang mag intay sa wala. Nakakapagod yung walang assurance.
Kasi naman. Sino ba ang nagsabi sa yo na bumalik ka after 10 heart years? Ala nman di ba?
Wag ka kasing magbigay ng mixed signals.
Mahina ako dyan. Kahit nung college.
I know i need to stop. Pero pag naaalala ko to, nagdadalawang isip ako:
You might regret putting an end to something that once made you smile...
Oo, aminado ako. You can really make me smile. Pero aminin mo, you are also the reason why my tears are my companion tonight.

Masukista

Sabi ng friend ko : it is better to accept the fact that you are not appreciated than to insist yourself to someone who will never see your worth.
Tama nga nman. Pero ang tao, pag na inlove, masukista din e. Alam mo ng alang patutunguhan,pero andun ka pa din. Nakatunganga. Nag iintay ng himala n baka sakali e mapansin ka nya.
Alam na alam ko ang feeling na to. But then again, people grow. Ang i will, one of these days. So mababawasan ka na ng admirers. Malapit na akong umayaw. Malapit na malapit na.

True Love

One of my friends told me that she does not believe in true love...anymore haha. Nung mga nakaraang araw daw, oo pa. Pero ngayon hindi na. Hay... Di ko alam na sasang ayon ako until recently. Tama, hindi totoo ang true love.
Ang dami ko ng pimples at ito ay dahil napupuyat ako sa kakaisip sa yo. Tapos, ngyon, paranoid naman dahil i know you are keeping secrets from me. I can feel it in my bones. I know that you are hiding something.
Madali naman akong kausap. All you needed to do is to tell me na...na...you...hay, i cant even write it down. That is how much it hurts. Just the thought of you not telling me everything, it hurts!
Another harsh reality; those that we cant live without, can live without us.
(again,kwento mo to.bawal ang name dropping)

Sadista

I was doing perfectly fine in my own world. Tapos dadating ka. Ok lang sana kung wala kang ginawang problema, pero meron, meron, meron!
Sanay na akong ang crush lang ay ang mga artistang lumalabas sa tv. Sanay na ko na ang nagugustuhan lang e yung mga idol kong singers. Tapos ito ka..magbabalik after 10 heart years...
Isa lang naman ang sagot dito: time and space.
If absence can make the heart go fonder, it can also make the heart forget. Just like 2 years ago. Nakalimutan ko ang crush kong superior ko kasi nagkalayo kami. I know, ito din ang solusyon sa problemang ito.
I just hate this feeling. Sobrang paranoid. Feeling ko kasi e hindi ka nagsasabi ng totoo.
Nakakatawa lang, kasi alam ko na ala namang epekto sa yo ang mga pangyayari. Clueless ka kaya di mo alam na nakakasakit ka na! Anything that you say or do affects me. Lalo na pag di paborable sa kin ang mga ito.
I know, makaka move on din ako. Kailangan lang ng tamang mindset. Pasasaan bat dadating din ang panahon na tatawanan ko nalang tong kalokohan ko sa yo. Aja!
(Ito po ay istorya mo. Kung magcocomment, bawal ang mag name drop hahaha)

Harsh Reality

You can close your eyes if there are things you dont want to see,but you can never protect your heart from the things you dont want to feel. Ouch!
This was a text message i received from a friend. Nakakainis. Sapul na sapul lng.
Kahapon ko pa pinag iispan/pinagpaplanuhan kung pano wag maapektuhan sa mga bagay bagay. Kung pede lang na magkaron ng on and off switch ang puso,sobrang helpful nito para pag alam mo na masasaktan ka sa mga nakikita o makikita mo, just push the off button and you will free yourself of the pain. The problem is, alang ganun. So ala kang choice kundi maramdaman ang mga bagay n pilit mong iniiwasan. If only the heart wont beat for the person who is causing all that pain. If only ...

It Is Now:The Journey of the Broken Hearted

Hmmm..i know that i promised to post some of pictures from our recent trip to Malaysia and Thailand. But at this point in time, let me address the prevailing issue/s that me and my friends need to face; and that is Landing on one's feet.
You by now do have the idea of what i am talking about. If not, please refer to the title of this entry and i do hope that you will be able to discern what it is haha!
An epidemic had been disturbing my closest friends.
The scienfific name of the virus: broken heartus masakitus!haha